Saying “I Love You”

Geplaatst op 28-04-2026

Lets talk about love. I don’t know if its an emotion, exactly (or a drug) but it is certainly a powerful impulse. A woman in love with you is willing to put up with all kinds of shit from you, do anything for you, go through hell and still come out the other side with a smile. Women in love will rationalize any behavior or words of yours simply because they luuuurrrvveee you.

How do you know a woman is in love with you?

You know. I mean, its really easy to tell. One thing about women is that they are absolute shit at playing anything close to the chest. They always show their cards because their hamsters have convinced them they’re always right. A woman can’t fathom not winning so she’s okay with showing her hand to you almost immediately. Because of that a woman will always tilt her hand when she’s in love.

She’ll be a little bit more clingy, she’ll go out of her way to do things for you, she’ll be disproportionally upset when you don’t want to be with her or can’t be with her – I mean if you can’t tell she’s head over heels for you then you probably need to start back at the beginning of the blog and build up your social acumen.

Tell her you love her

LOL! just kidding. Don’t do that. Never drop the L-Bomb first, no matter what. Here’s why: Men are the gatekeepers of commitment. She may put out and sleep with you, she may buy you gifts, do things for you around the house, wear a nice dress and be a trophy at a party or event – but you aren’t dating unless you say so. You have to understand that the entirety of her female power is derived from her vagina. All of it. Once she has slept with you she has abdicated all of her power over to you.

Now that she’s slept with you and no longer has any power over you, nothing with which to bargain or lord over you, it is up to you to settle down and be in a relationship with her. You now hold all of the cards. However, when you drop the L-Bomb first – no matter how soon or late in the “relationship” – you are surrendering your power back to her. You are telling her that you need her, giving her presence in your life the authority her pussy once had. She now holds the cards because if she leaves, you’ll be broken – you’ll do anything to keep her.

If, however, you don’t drop the L-Bomb first, then she knows she has to keep working and surrendering to you in order to earn your love – see how that works?

Is it ever okay to tell her you love her?

Sure. Just don’t do it first, or often. The first time she tells you she loves you, if possible, look her in the eyes, smile – even do that thing where you put your forehead against her – and say, “Good.” Then kiss her. This is romantic, endearing, and you don’t actually have to drop the L-Bomb back and commit yourself.

In general I would stick to the 2/3 rule for ILYs – for every two times she says it to you, say it once to her. Its sort of like leaving a trail of crumbs, you know? You want to string her along with it and keep her interested, keep her chasing – but no so much that she feels its hopeless trying to be with you. It’s a delicate dance, really.

She loves you, but you don’t love her

At this point, what you really need to ask is: What are your goals?

If you want to keep her around because she’s a great lay and you enjoy the company, but don’t necessarily love her, then just lie. Yeah, that’s a horrible thing to do – but hey! See the above and proceed as if those are your real feelings. Who knows, you might actually fall for her if she’s a decent woman and go in on a dog together.

If you don’t love her and she loves you, and you don’t want to take things any further, it may be good to just tell her that. “Look Cindy, you’re wonderful… I’m just not in a place in my life where I can have that kind of commitment. I need to work out some things before I’m ready for that. But you’re a fantastic girl, and anyone would be lucky to have you – I just don’t want to see you wasting your time on me.”

Or you can do it like me: “Want to be fuck buddies?”

“I’m not that kind of girl!”

“I understand. I think its best that we don’t see each other anymore.”

^Real text exchange